Email from Grammy

Monday, August 2, 2010

As most of you love, I love my Grammy in a way that's hard for me to comprehend, much less explain. She raised me, alongside my parents, when I was a child, and I am so close to her. She is my best friend!

I lived with her in 2006 for about a year until I got married and moved to Louisville. It was a very tough year for both of us. She was struggling with losing her independence, and it was getting harder for her to get around. She really shouldn't have been living at home at that point, but I wanted her to live there as long as possible, so I moved in with her. I was dealing with huge amounts of stress in my life: graduating from college, waiting tables {but looking for a "real job"}, devoting a lot of time to my church & Campus Crusade, dating a boy and wondering whether or not he was going to ask me marry him (which turned into the stress of being engaged, wedding planning, preparing to move to another state for the first time)... you get the picture. And besides the stress of being her primary caregiver -- a task for which I was unequipped -- it was emotionally taxing just to see my beloved Grammy struggling so much. I often responded to her in frustration and misdirected anger, and that made me even more angry -- at myself, of course, not at her.

I was just looking through my old email account this morning and I found an email from dear Grammy, sent in 2006. She had an email account for a short time and was never very good at it (but I really admire her for even trying!). I couldn't stop laughing at a portion of this email; I think you might find it funny, too:

...I have tried to do all I can for you as God told me, it is not a doting love but a true love from God and you have never disappointed me until recently you have really been on my nerves and I don't know why?????? Perhaps it is just my reaction to some of your outbursts that make me cry because I get on your nerves. Let us all three pray for this old woman that is growing inside me. Erase this after you read it. I will love you forever. Grammy (and John Wesley too)

Isn't that so funny (and sweet)?? Bless her heart. Those were such trying times for both of us. I am so very grateful for the three years (and counting!) we've had on the other side of that hard time. Even though it's been incredibly difficult to be away from her, we've had a sweet friendship and I've been able, at least in my mind, to make amends for my terrible behavior {even though she tells me every time we talk that I've "never been any trouble" - ha!}. Unfortunately, I didn't have that opportunity with "Grampie," but that's another story for another time.

Thank you, God, for Grammy!


Amanda said...

Beth, this is honestly one of the most adorable pictures I have ever seen. You are a very special granddaughter.

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